The last year gone down

I still remember the day I landed my first foot here
yes a year back, naive and a total novice....
I still remember the day I wrote my first anguish here
yes the "calm like a bomb...", nonchalant and numb now...

This one year away from the family and loved ones,
is one precious year taken away from my wicked life...
This one year full of academic and experienceable gains,
is still one wretched year added to my list of unrecoverable items...

Life teaches you they say, sure I am always learning..
you will meet new people, they say, sure I am a social animal...
you will leave the old people, the loved ones, they say not,
But yet quite ironically, they also say, Dream as if you'll live forever...

This last year, has given me so much time, enough time for me,
to wonder almost everything that I could never wonder about...
to spend every painstakingly long minute with myself, until I hated it...
to realize so many trivial things, to which I was totally oblivious till now.
Quarter-life-Crisis is what they claim this is, crisis is the only term that I understand !!!

Richer in experience, but still a novice is what I am relatively,
But I am not gullible enough to get lost in this rat race,
because this one year, has made me stop in my strides
and take notice of the things that matter most to me
and question the things that are taken for granted always
whether I am hitting the right stones, that only time can tell !!!

( or see this space in the future !!!)

Right now, I feel numb and it makes me act nonchalant.
I am Still Calm like a bomb, but only with hundreds of explosions inside...
I am Still a novice, but only that I am used to it now ...
But I sure am not naive, so do I think ...

Yet it is a year gone down ...

©®™ Akshay Puli ™®©

The Naked 'U-TOP-ian' society - For the good of WOMEN ;)

It's no news that I ardently oppose the riots (as i call it) against women all over the world and more importantly in India. Well the idea that I am going to propose today is definitely going to make news, one heck of a news :). So let us keep it just between us and if someone, gets offended, then..... wait for it .... lol, think you never read it in the first place. This is a solution in the lighter vein, but logical ( to me at least ), if not practical :), but what the heck, how many people here like thinking or reading about practical book-style stuff. Yes if you are one of them, then please go read cnnibn.com :).

Coming back to the point. Women, God's greatest creation .Well there is so much beauty around- hills, rocks, animals, birds etc but what is the point, as none of them show (or have) emotions like women do. I agree they can also be the most confusing and notorious creatures ( no pun intended) around, but well the bottom-line is - there is no life (from a human beings perspective) without them. So let us save our assess, by saving the womenfolk, by protecting them, by addressing the issues they have, my giving them the center-stage, by letting them know they are the most important creatures around, let us start showing them respect ( not some, all of what you got !!).

So let us recount the riots on women that I am talking about -Rape, female infanticide, feoticide, Slavery, sexual abuse, genocide, dowry, AIDS, Child marriages, etc. Most of them are a result of men out there, who are so full of themselves,egoistic and who look at women just as an instrument serving several purposes, I am sure , you have heard all these before !

I must have had the women all blushing up and happy until now and the guys ready to kick me, but wait for it.. don't conclude, not yet ;). Let us for a moment think why men ( most or few ) behave the way I mentioned above ? It is well known that human beings always like doing, what they are asked not to and attain something that seems difficult to attain. Studies have shown that's how the mind is programmed to, it doesn't like being bogged down by any situation. This is true for everyone- all men and women, the only thing that varies from person to person is the intensity level to which their brains are programmed to.

Children whose parents asked them to take drugs at a younger age, have turned out to be the idealistic human beings. Think about it. I can quote infinite instances like that and you know it too, ask your mind.

So the thing which I am trying to drive home is that 'don't deny people anything'. Is it the Gandhian way, emphasized in a different angle in Munnabhai-2 ? The more you deny people, the more they would want to have it. They will go to any means to achieve it, so I guess the solution is to let people take the course they want to. I am sure there will be absolute chaos, if this is done, but then the chaos will have to eventually settle and that, that is the revival of mankind, that is going to be the Utopian society, which books and scholars have been trying to aim for !

Well all the problems arise because we act pricey for everything and with everyone, cut all that and everything will fall into place. Remember the time of Adam and Eve ! Wasn't that the ideal Utopian society which we are all trying to get to again ? Why was it so ideal ? Because Adam and Eve were naked. :D..One needs to have the freedom to roam around naked, and by one, I mean Women. That's when you realize Utopian society is here

Picture this ! You have an Iron briefcase with heavy locks and security, handcuffed to your hand with strong iron chains, someone would always want to tear it open and look in. What you have inside the briefcase may be diamonds or something, which all human beings have already seen before and by covering it up, by securing them away from the public eye, you are just creating the zeal to peek in, the inquisitiveness to break it open. So you are prompting an attack on yourself, for the diamonds. Once broken one realizes , Ah !! Just another diamond , but still you made them break in, by securing it.
If on the other hand, you just display those diamonds without concealing them, you know carefree, no one would really seem interested to break in, remember everyone knows how diamonds look like, so don't conceal them. Let them say "Ah !! Just another diamond " before breaking in, not after breaking in life before. In this way you are definitely avoiding a personal attack on you by someone who wants to break open the briefcase and have a glance of the diamonds. There, you have prevented a rape , err I mean a theft :D. Common looks don't kill, they don't cost either !! A glance is going to save you so much of trouble. See an idea can change your life. :)

You surely understood what I am talking about. You know what the briefcase is and what the diamonds are ;). That is the freedom I am waiting for, that is the society I am aiming for, that sure is UTOPIA. May not sound practical ,but is logical and sometimes hard decisions need to be taken- for the good- for everyone's good-good in the longer run. It is a win-win situation for everyone in the longer run.

Make the President of United States and there you have U-TOP-ia;)

P.S : icing on the cake- U can also play, look,etc the Diamonds, with the owner's permission of course, that's UTOPIA. Also remember we come and go alone, we don't take anything with us, nothing absolutely, so share your diamonds with others, let there be peace all over again, let us bring back images of ADAM and EVE among us :-p. Make me the president :)

The 'ONE'.

where is 'the one' i seek...
Where is 'the one', i ask ...
where is 'the one' I am passionate about ?

passsion , zeal is what I want , I rant...
he asks, wats the thing with passion...
its all to do with the passion.... I say ..

the fire to achieve sumthing...
the fervor to learn anything..
she is 'the one' i am passionate about...
i don't get it, he says...

the excitement in doing small things...
the freedom in dreaming bigger things...
the nonchalance about who she is …
get it yet , dumbo? Nah !! , he wails…

the courage to think different …
the voice to make the crowd stare in awe…
no nonsense is the way she goes…
talk some English!! , he screams…

the motivation to stop me from being the fool I am …
the optimism to call shyt a fertilizer ..
the zeal to be just what she is…
and yet she is simple and on cloud 0..
that’s my gal , dood !!

I want to find her … This wait is too painful…
I want to fall in love with her… this anguish is too deep…
I want to snuggle into her…this heart is too fragile…
I want to bitch to her…this world is too bad and scary…
I hate and I fear finding place in the wrong arms yet again…

Eureka!! I understand he says …
Wake up, dream’s over boy!! He smirks…
Your alarm’s been barking for an hour, shouts he…
the clock says 15 mins past my class time…

©®™ Akshay Puli ™®©

The Shyt Monologues -" would you have felt like this in India ? "

So, why are we always supposed to talk about the good things or the sad things, but not of the supposedly embarrassing things, things which are considered a taboo, the discomforting things....I have always been an un-conventionalist , I always do things the way they aren't supposed to be done. So here I am ,writing this blog, when I am supposed to be studying for my first midterm of this new spring semester....

Why today ? When I am supposed to be studying and its not like I write blogs everyday... well see I am unorthodox....well, it's because I was just shyting a while back.. Yup ! you heard me !!

So you know the topic I am going to write about today. It's what we do everyday( in some instances more than once ) and everybody I know and I don't know, does it and just not us human beings, every living being on Earth and maybe even the aliens do it. heck !! they do it too.. So why don't we ever talk about it. Well if you are still acting dumb and ignorant and hoping that, I am not going to talk about, what you think I am talking about, then sorry to disappoint you, but I am going to write about shytting today- the process of defecating or excreting , as I remember it from my 10th science textbook( or mayb even a lesser grade) . The thesaurus has got this to say-defecate, eject, eliminate, emanate, evacuate, exhale, expel, exudate, exude, give off, ejaculate( this one doesn't belong in here, lest I should be branded a retard, as if talking bout shyt wasn't enough), leak, pass, urinate,( Strangely I haven't got ideas about them yet)perspire, secrete, sweat, throw off, void ( i am never going to talk about it) ..produce ( what the heck is he talking about ?- Produce what Gold mines ?? )

Well, yup I was just taking a shyt ( Hell , when you can call it's sister, as 'taking a leak' ) a few minutes back in the school library ( Cut that sleazy expression off your face, I am not the first one to do it, remember the time you did it ... ) . Just then I felt so much at peace and in comfort ( well, yaa I am still in the public toilet). Next thing that came into my mind, " would I have felt like this in India ? , wait .. No .. wrong question .." would I have done it in India, in the first place " ...Well don't even think about it, the answer is a plain straight no. As a matter of fact, I am sure the shyt would itself get humiliated to grace the presence of a public toilet in India. And ya I am assuming the public toilets haven't changed much in India in the last 7 months, Hell I am pretty sure it wouldn't change for the next .. well . lets get practical , they won't ever change in India..... No offense meant though. It is just not " socially /economically " ( whatever that means ) possible in India....I still love India /hyd for what it is.. I misssssss...

So then my mind traversed to " what are the 10 best things I like in AMRIKA ( America)" ( Yup I was still shytting !! ) ....The first thing, undoubtedly was " taking a shyt in a public toilet and feeling so comfortable and totally at peace doing it " ...Next I thought of all the other things, that are noteworthy about America ( will leave it for the next blog - U know it means never, acc. to my lingo , but anyways lets see) ... Then my mind was thinking about how I should so totally write a blog the moment I come out ... so here I am doing that ...( of course after washing up :-p ) ....

I was thinking next about the things that people here do when they are sitting on the pot ( of course the public toilets ) .

1. I understand the American's die hard love for Coke ( I am talking about the drink, this time) , but common, how do you shyt while you drink or drink while you shyt ...I am sure there are people out there, who drink milk while shytting too.. Gold help the cows !!! ...

2. Even worse, I have seen people take cookies inside along with them and Pizza boxes .. Holy moly !! what the heck , people.. are you out of sides or whippings ??

3. Newspapers , Books , Sudokus , etc - Guys there is a reason why they provide tissues in there .( Yup this is not India !! ) ..

4. Back packs ...bags , etc - Someone is getting a "surprise surprise" delivery tonight ha !!

well then my mind was like please stop thinking this now. I felt losing out the comfortable feeling I was having until then.

So I started thinking of how in countries like India, Pakistan and most of the Muslim nations, taking a shyt is similar to sex . Well I guess you have reached your saturation point with me and my blog about shyt ha ? I understand, because I have very very very .. high regards for sex too, just like you. But see if I am thinking wrong. In India, for example 'talking about sex is such a big taboo" . and the same assumption still continues, I am sure India hasn't changed much in the last 7 months. Similarly, talking about Shyt too is a big taboo. There I found a similarity and I lost all my peace and the comfort I was having. So finally I got up from the pot and you know the rest .... :-d

Well I would like to close off on a serious point. It definitely helps to know you have a second home, in case of emergency :-d. ( and as good as your home ) . I swear I never felt like that once in my 21 years spent in India. Dammit ! I never even felt at home even when I was in my relatives places, friends places, or for that matter even in ITC VIP suite , toilet. That used to be one of my biggest nightmares and only reason ( in addition to no money ), that I would think of, for not traveling in India. But still I did cover most part of India, except the East , Kerala and UP ...
But now I wake up every morning here in America, with this one comforting feeling, irrespective of my grades and working like a pig , that I know I won't feel that discomfort or rather my shyt won't feel bad ..... GOD BLESS AMRIKA :-p..

Hell that was a serious one .:-p. Now the real serious point. Live your life, the way you want to. Don't let it be affected by what others think. You are free to talk , what you want and write what you want, I would have added a clause if I was in India, saying, "until you don't hurt others feelings/sentiments". But a strange thing about this amrika is there is no such clause in here !! [:d] ..

In any case don't think twice if you havta call a spade ,a spade , or a shyt , a shyt !!!

I better catch up with my midterm now, lest I would be shat all over in the exam.

And remember the power is yours ( Of course, your fire, your shyt, your power ;) ) -Captain Planet istyyle...

Tangible Assets !!

I am real, you are fake.
The Ego is real, the attitude is fake.
The beard is real, the smile is fake.
The Sun is real , the green here is fake.

The effort is real, the result is fake.
The pain is real, the comfort is fake.
The mind is real, the beauty is fake.
The Lust is real, the love is fake.

Silicon is real, Silicones are fake ;)
Passions are real, Occupations are fake.
Acquisition is real , competition is fake.
Market is real , school is fake.

Time is real, money is fake.
Eco system is real, Home-Systems are fake.
The thoughts are real , actions are fake.
Foes are real, friends are fake.

War is real , peace is fake.
Solitude is real, company is fake.
Ex-es are real , GFs are fake.
Name is real , fame is fake.

Poverty is real, wealth is fake.
Corruption is real, philanthropy is fake.
Eccentric is real , Conventional is fake.

Science is real , GoD is ....well, Reallllll !!!

©®™ Akshay Puli ™®©

Evolution by ~The analogy GURU !!!

first came the worms( ponting, Mcgrath etc),
then the monkeys ( symonds.)
then the common folk,
then the Indian fans,
then the Sachin fans,
then ME-THE SACHIN FANATIC,
then my parents,
then the angels(you know ;) ),
then God
and then CAME SACHIN and there stopped the machine..

Amen!!oops A-Sachin-not-men

©®™ Akshay Puli ™®©